Dear Friends,
Summer is winding down, the heat is somewhat steady, and I’m hoping the flow of your life is carrying you in the ease and delight of being on a lazy river. There’s news I want to share with you - a change in plans from what I shared in my last update.
Here in Los Angeles, we sat down a few days ago to plan the October 1st celebration of life for Betsy. Looking at those logistics led us to switch from an on-site event to an online presence. The plan evolved into having a website that we will launch on Betsy’s 70th birthday, October 3rd, which will include a video montage, the updates and photos that I’ve sent out, a playlist of the music that lifted Betsy’s soul, and a place for sharing comments and stories, which we really encourage you to do as this is what will give it life. If there are photos, audio clips or video clips you’d like to have included, please send them to me (via DropBox or WeTransfer if they don’t fit in an email) and Jess will upload them. I’ll be sending out a link to the website in the last days of September.
I apologize for any disappointment to those of you who were looking forward to coming here to participate in person to celebrate Betsy with us and with others from the community. You are still welcome to share your love and to visit us here at some point, but the community gathering just won’t physically be here. Our intention is to provide you who hold Betsy in your hearts with a beautiful and soulful place to go online that enables you to contribute to the love being collectively shared by the community.
What’s happening here currently is that the cabin I’m already sleeping in is 3/4 finished. Construction in Jess and Phil’s backyard started August 1st with groundbreaking by Jessica, Romy, Dallas and myself digging holes for the footings. Some windows are in and the walls and roof are up. Doors and the rest of the windows might be in by the end of the month. After that will be insulating, dry walling, putting on whatever will go on the outside walls, installing shelves, painting, and laying a Pergo floor. I think this whole thing came about because the kids worried, “what’s dad going to do without mom?” They’ll keep an eye on me, and it’ll be fun being a resident grandparent, though I’ll be spending some time in San Diego, as well.
Phil has been spearheading this project and, with the help of his father John, they have been doing 90% of the work. Phil is also doing a project for Nike and one for On Running in Switzerland, and is preparing for an art show near the end of September. Jessica is helping with the construction, documenting it photographically, and editing a book, all while taking care of Story. Story started walking on her 1st birthday, June 19th, and went right into running and kicking a soccer ball, just as expected. Now that Cassidy is back from her 2 months in Oregon and other ports of call, she is helping out with the construction, too. She and I left together In late June for our annual pilgrimage to the Oregon Country Fair, preceded and followed by sweet visits with friends and, in her case, festivals. Since I got back from that trip I’ve been splitting my time between Los Angeles and San Diego, working with clients and lending a hand with the construction project. Phil’s parents, Romy and John, have been here for the month, immersing themselves in construction and finding a myriad of ways to nurture Story and the rest of us. And Romy is also preparing to lead a yoga trip to Greece in October.
We’re planning to go to Paonia in October, to go through our family storage locker there (finally!) and see friends, both individually and collectively. Being the most recent place where Betsy and I had a rich sense of community, this is where we will likely have some in-person community gathering over a meal.
As to how we’re all doing, we’re each in different forms and stages of grief and grief counseling and, speaking for myself, the surreal layer on the landscape of life is still present. But I haven’t stopped moving through it. I’m in no rush and have no agenda (other than finishing my book); just respecting the unfolding with eyes wide open.
Since my last update I’ve stayed in Betsy’s and my RV in San Diego twice for at least a week each time. Like my engagement these past 5 months with a number of places, people, and events, my experience has been bittersweet and, in a whole new way, growthful. Embracing joy is still somewhat slow but my work, family, friends, and sense of purpose ground me on a path of healing.
I’m still finding the emails and other contact I get from this wonderfully loving and supportive community to be so emotionally moving and nurturing. Thank you so much for your connection, compassion and care, for your poetry and paintings and persistent checking up on me. I’ll leave you with more photos… and a little written word at the end.
Love,
Jimmy
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